The Jefferson Iowa News®


  Swimming Team Welcomes New Member

The Jefferson area swimming team, already over 100-strong, has added a new member. According to conference bylaws, virtually any member of the community can become a team member. This loophole has allowed Coach Walter Flailer to add Brutus Cat. Flailer stated that the addition of Brutus has made our team the conference favorite. When asked what Brutus specialized in, Flailer replied, "kicking butt."

Brutus will anchor all relay teams. As he is only five years old, he is able to compete in all events. Brutus has also brought with him his own training regimen and diet, which seems to be catching on among other team members. Coach Flailer on the positive impact of Brutus Cat - "Two of our girls ate nothing but Kit 'N' Kaboodle for two weeks. At the end of that time, I'll be danged if their times in the 50 meter freestyle didn't improve by almost .3 seconds!"

Coach Flailer has also proposed reducing the length of the pool by one meter. "I noticed last season that we lost a whole bunch of races by less than one meter. With this reduction, we probably would have at least tied in most of those." 

Boyce Bailey, 08-29-2010