The Jefferson Iowa News®



I'm happier than a pig at Goose Lake!

After 47 years in the Senate, screwing things up, and generally making a buffoon of himself, Ted Kennedy is finally dead! And it didn't take some gun-toting crazy to shoot him - they didn't think he mattered enough.

It's too bad it took so long, because before he died, Ted screwed up everything he touched. He started by having his brothers get him into Harvard, then cheating to get through law school. That's right - a guy who cheated his way through law school getting to decide who sits on the Supreme Court! He called Robert Bork a racist and Clarence Thomas a pervert! How would you like to be called a pervert by Ted Kennedy? This is the same man who got drunk, drove off a bridge, and left a girl there to drown!!

This guy flew to Moscow during Reagan's tenure and apologized for our president's behavior, offering to support legislation favorable to keeping the Soviet Union in place! Then when Reagan won the cold war, Teddy took the credit! This guy was completely absurd.

The worst part was that all those idiots kept electing him! How stupid do you have to be to continually elect a fat, drunken, overrated commie-loving blowhard just because of his famous last name?

I hope those moronic democrats in congress attach his name to the current health care bill so that we can defeat it and give him a proper send-off!

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Orville K. Bass, American

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