The Jefferson Iowa News®



I get madder than Dick Butkus at Barney Frank's house on Super Bowl Sunday when I see all these so-called qualified women running for public office! They even think it would be lovely to be allowed to be President for a change! To that I say, Bullcrackers! Even most women know that they are inferior to men! This is where political correctness has to stop! Do you really think a woman could handle the nuclear football? Have you ever seen a woman handle a football??

I could bore you with all kinds of mind-numbing statistics to prove my point (and I'll bet they would), but because my allotted space is so small, how about some rather obvious observations? Ever notice that men wear watches? It's because there's a limited amount of time in a day and men want to know how to efficiently allocate their daily ass-kicking! Women wear bracelets! I guess ugly women think it makes them pretty.

Here's an observation - Jesus was a man! Here's another one - over two-thirds of the illiterates on this great earth are women! All the great scientists - men! The great artists - men! The best athletes - men! The great world leaders - men! Who built the cities we live in - men! Who is physically stronger - men! And don't whine about women not getting a fair chance and the same education - if women were so great, why did they let men get the better of them for so long?

It is important that we continue electing men to positions of power, where crucial decisions need to be made! Women will say that we have screwed it up, but if they were in power the world would either already be lost beyond all hope or not worth living in, anyway. I, Orville K. Bass, have prepared a very short, partial list of just a few of the many, many things men can do that women can't:
  1. Go topless
  2. Hold our booze
  3. Grow a beard
  4. Navigate spatially
  5. Play real sports
  6. Fertilize eggs
  7. Pee standing up
  8. Get sexier with age

Stand up and be counted! Election results show that women voters ALWAYS vote for the younger, better-looking guy! No exception! We need to stick together and offset these morons, their voting power, and especially those ridiculous female candidates! All real men need to take the following quiz which will help you put these things in perspective.

Link - Click here to take the Real Man's Quiz!

here to visit the entire Bass Archives

Orville K. Bass, American

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