The Jefferson Iowa News®

 

  PUBLIC CONNED BY BOTTLED WATER (SURPRISE)

I can't believe how gullible the American consumers are! It all started several years back, when a French company called Perrier put a few ounces of water in an elegant bottle and convinced Americans it was cool to pay a bunch of money for it! What a bunch of suckers!

Today, Evian water costs more than gasoline (about $5 per gallon)! Water comes out of public fountains for free! It comes out of your tap for pennies! Why buy it in bottles?!? People say "it tastes better"! Guess what? ABC News ran a taste test. They put two imported waters up against Aquafina, a Wal-Mart brand, and water from a public drinking fountain in Harlem.

Only one water got "bad" ratings - EVIAN! Most people liked Wal-Mart's brand or Harlem's public water! Studies continually prove that people absolutely cannot tell the difference between different waters - because it's water, for cripes' sake!

I thought maybe it wasn't taste, but purity that folks cared about! Lots of people think that bottled water is "cleaner". Guess what? Microbiologists at the University of New Hampshire tested all of these samples and declared that there was no difference!

Scientific tests continually prove that tap water is as good for you as bottled water that costs 500 times more! I actually ran into a lady who claimed that her dog would only drink Evian water! If the American consumer really has that much disposable income they should quit talking about a recession!

Here's a newsflash! Water is water! It has no taste! When people are asked what is more expensive, water or gasoline, they constantly state "gasoline"! Bottled water costs much more than gas! And all you have to do is filter it and open a tap! In most instances it is even filtered for you!

The next time you tell some one what kind of water you like, stop for a moment and think about what a total fool you sound like! The only people you are impressing are complete idiots!

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Orville K. Bass, American


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