APRIL TOP TEN LIST
Top Ten Reasons the Easter Bunny Won't Be Visiting Jefferson
10. Last year he asked if he could have Easter off
9. For an extra $20, he keeps trying to sell "Easter grass"
8. Last year, showed up for egg roll with eggrolls
7. Last time, he was chased, caught, and devoured
6. He annually ends up in the drunk tank
5. He's worried about becoming part of Bigfoot's key chain collection
4. He says there are too many rat traps set locally
3. Costume made from rabbits he hit on Highway 4
2. His Easter basket is always filled with menthol cigarettes
1. He told all the kids that Santa wasn't real