MARCH TOP TEN LIST

 

Top Ten Signs It's Spring In Jefferson

 

10. Number of assaults committed with snow shovels drops off

9. Snowball fights replaced with cat hackey

8. Sanitation department picks up last year's Christmas trees

7. Fewer guys walking around making annoying "brrr" sound

6. Squirrels in Russell Park no longer storing crack

5. Local bars offer "wet hat" contests

4. 20% increase in crimes committed with rakes

3. Chalk body outlines become less bulky

2. Melted snow means we finally solve lots of missing-person cases

1. Casey's changes hot dog water

 

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